I know this guy who's wife never wanted to have sex. He would ask my advice on what I thought the problem was and what he could do to make her want to have sex with more frequency.
He said she always complained about her body and said she felt too fat and unattractive. I asked him how he would respond to that and he said he would assure her that he was still attracted to her (this couple had been married for over 20 years). While we are having this converstation he happened to be looking through a W magazine that was laying on the table. When he would come across a photo of a young, thin, exceptionally beautiful (ahem..airbrushed) model, he would comment on how hot she was. I pointed out that it was interesting that he didn't make the same comments when he flipped to a page with an ordinary, middle aged, not emaciated woman.
When he really thought about it he finally had some sort of understanding about how his wife might somehow have gotten the idea that he didn't find her attractive anymore.
I told him the next time he was flipping through one of her Redbooks or Better Homes & Gardens to look for a picture of a woman who had similar features and body size to his wife and comment nonchalantly on how attractive she is. Maybe when his wife takes a peek at her, she will think "now that I can compete with". If all men did this for their wives or girlfriends then maybe we could start reprogramming the female population to believe we are good enough just the way we are.