Friday, June 15, 2007
the dickhead lane and dickhead semi driver
I was driving back from a visit with Preppygirl yesterday and it was hellacious. Pretty much the entire state of Ohio is under construction and just when you get a good stride going and have the cruise control set, you come upon another single lane work area.
So, I was in such a stretch and cruising along listening to Sharkboy and Lavagirl play on the DVD player, when I suddenly realized that I was in the dreaded "dickhead lane."
I am usually a very curteous driver and have been known to wave other drivers in front of me in because I know that sometimes people end up in that lane by accident. So, when it happened to me, I fully expected some kind, easy going driver to make way so I could merge. No such luck.
I had not seen the road sign that said "left lane ends" and didn't realize that it was ending until I was already past the last car in the right lane. You know, you have no choice at that point but to put on the turn signal and creep your way into the right lane. It's not like you can put it in reverse and go back to the end of the line. I didn't try to drive all the way to front like some "dickheads" do, I was only trying to cut in a few cars ahead of where I would have been anyway. I picked a semi, because usually it takes them a little longer to creep forward and you have some space. Well, the asshole semi I chose was like that freaking crazy semi driver from that 1970's movie "Duel." He literally would get like inches from the car in front of him just so I could not get in. I had my signal on and it was obvious I needed in but he would not relent. I tried several tmes and even gave the "please, sorry, my bad" look, like just let me in, but he would rather cause an accident than let me in (and with kids in my car!!)
I was forced to drive up to the front of the line and cut off an unsuspecting girl. I was certain he was coming after me to force me off the road. I seriously was so creeped out that I drove about 85 mph for an hour to get as far away from him as I could. I know there must have been other red semis because I swear that I kept seeing a red semi in my rear view mirror. CREEEPY!!