Friday, October 27, 2006

vagina monologues

i've had some interesting posts lately haven't i? not.

well here's one the fellows might want to skip (and anyone else who isn't interested in hearing about my vagina)

I had my yearly exam (ladies YOU know the one) about two weeks ago. I know, fun, right?! Well, I got a call from my doctor a week later. Yes the actual doctor left the message not the nurse or receptionist so of course I'm freaking out. She tells me who she is and that I need to call her back.
Well, I call back and talk to her nurse (because at this point doctor is busy of course) and find out I have to have a "colposcopy" (not colonoscopy). WTF? Let me tell you that a colposcopy is a wonderful little test that involves a speculum, metal scraper, black goo, and ends with the doctor shoving a tampon up so far that you feel it in your stomach.
The actual definition can be found here if anyone cares to read it.

My pap came back with "mild dysplasia" and this is the standard test to determine if it actually is dysplasia or just an infection or something that caused the test to read abnormal. It must be very common because first the nurse asked me if I'd ever had this procedure before. "uh...no" and then when my doctor came in she also asked if I'd ever had this done before (she said it in a way that was like "gee everybody is doing it") She said that I have to call for the results next week (now watch she'll call and leave a message for me to call her again and I'll think the worst). Anyway if it is dysplasia then I'll have to undergo some sort of "cryosurgery." Sounds fun doesn't it? NOT. Hopefully that won't be necessary.

hopefully all you women have had your yearly exam this year because this is the kind of stuff it finds and if it is dysplasia which could be pre-cancer cells (if i'm understanding correctly) then i'm certainly glad they found it now and not in five years when it's not in the "pre" stage anymore. So, ladies if you love your vagina (and who doesn't?) then make the call.